47th Inauguration v. “Young, Famous & African”

(** Spoiler Alert!**)

I am of course fully aware of the current events in DC, I am just unconcerned for reasons we will touch on later. In the words of Dr. King, whom we honor today, “we must accept finite disappointment but never lose infinite hope.” So we move….

To heal my soul, I watch what some may deem to be trash TV… “Men will leave you in desert with no water” is back, baby! The Netflix hit series is filmed in Sandton, Jo’Burg – richest square mile in Africa. I will now offer my unfiltered review of the show for which I may be crucified. Dying wish: kindly, bedazzle my cross before hanging me. (Wink, Wink!) Ok so… Unfortunately, the cast loves to bleach & fake british accents. Plus, for reasons unknown, they love random colonial rites like Scottish Kites or European Tea Parties… Still, the show is an African product, so trust, I will consume it with appetite. Also, I don’t blame them, I blame colonization.

First things first, if Swanky is the King of Fashion, I beg, excommunicate me from that Kingdom. Respectfully, fits don’t give High Fashion, they give Carnival.

My favorite cast members are Khanyi & Nadia, they are kind and self-aware. Khanyi in particular is the Queen Mother (Reine Mère) of confidence, glam, and most importantly, humanity. I also like my East-African brother, Diamond Platnumz, he is one the richest yet one the simplest. Man’s a player but he is an honest player so we stan’…I applaud him for giving us an insight into a player’s mind! Basically, they want to taste all the meat in the jungle, the meat supply never finishes, and their stomachs never fill. Can’t be easy…

In contrast, forgive me beloved Nigerians, but the people they keep sending for you are giving you a bad look. Unless of course, the obnoxious and eccentric representation is an accurate one… Take Ini Edo for example, sis is a legend, we all grew up on her movies so I was excited to see her. But, the exaggerated mean-girl theatrics were childish. At best, she did it for a check; at worse, she is a bully in real life. Either way, it’s not cute. One day, we will need to talk about the toxic respect culture, classism, & inflated sense of self I’ve seen in lots of Nigerian communities. 1,2,3 “How Dare You”, 1,2,3 “Do you know how I am?”… AH.AH! Release us!

As for Annie, beyond her incredibly dramatic nature; I see deep sadness in her eyes. I wish I could print her a T-Shirt that says “Sis, don’t be selfless, you’re not the Messiah…”. At the same time, we must also respect every individual’s free will. It is what it is… Sending lots of E-Hugs to her. Lastly, Zari, and her chocolate trophy husband; I ain’t mad sis.

In conclusion. What’s the most Ghetto thing I’ve ever seen? Inaunthenticity.