Rwandan Style Orgy

Just came from Starbucks, left a tip but barrista didn’t notice. Kinda want my $2 back. I must be a fake humanitarian because I always want credit… Also, le nouveau son de Tayc et Charlotte est doux deh! “Dis moi qui t’a blessée, je ne peux pas laisser oh!” La La La…

“Girlllll – what about the Rwandan Orgy?” My Bad. My Bad. Low key pissed I was not invited. Jk. But according to the unreliably-sensational-messy-but-entertaining King of Rwandan Gossip, The Cat Babalao (Entertaining until it’s me, of course. I know, I know. Humans… C’est pas la peine.) According to the Cat, a young man, newlywed, seemingly in his 30s is reported to have allegedly cheated with 40 women in total. His wife having forgiven him a number of times is losing it and convening families and sh***. Let it be clear: I wish the individuals involved peace; this isn’t about them per se. This is about the shift of mentalities we work towards day & night. An African Man cheats and it’s just another Tuesday. Zero consequence. Zero shame. Nothing but bodily fluids flowing all over Nyarugenge.

NOW WHAT MY DEAR SISTERS? Some of you cheat back, some of you cut the thing off (Lorena Bobbitt)… BUT, I, a soon to be elected public official, cannot encourage criminality (I’ll bail you out though…) SO – As far as I’m concerned, unless you are the lucky 10% whose men are God-sent and behave, in which case just thank your Creator and shut up. Otherwise, I only see two noble options:

1. Accept the barbary, live with it, focusing on the greater goal of family unity, child- rearing etc.
2. ORRRR: Exit the mess, manage new incoming suitors, until you tire and settle for the least guilty ninja later.

BUT, SIS, you cannot spend your life battling men Goliath style, repeating the same “how could you?” speech every 1st of the month, ugly crying for life. A whole Queen like you? No, I will not permit. One Love,